Front-runner. Showstopper. Prima Donna. First.

I was driving back home with a friend today, and you know how girls are when they are on one of those drives? Plenty of bubblegum pop was played, being as we were in a peppy, merry mood for the holidays. Had not done one of those drives in a long while. Suddenly, I remembered that as a teenager, right around the time I was 15 or so, I was completely in love with Lindsay Lohan’s music. I loved her voice- how it seemed carelessly rough around the edges.. in total admiration of the way she admitted to her shortcomings, nevertheless asserting herself as being unabashedly herself. So conflicted, yet so comfortable in her skin, life and tribulations! Defining her own style of fun, hopes, and relationships. Edgy, with a hint of insecurity, but plenty of audacity. What is life if it isn’t peppered with a bit of it all, right?

So yeah, I wanna come FIRST. Top of the guest list.

First in your heart. First on your mind.

Not that I can’t handle being out of the spotlight, but if I have set my sights on it, it’s a goal worthy enough of an all-out effort, alright!

Up front and centre, because I am confident of holding it together when destiny beckons. Even then, I’m not afraid of falling short, cause I can only see it as a potential channel for my energy, an opportunity to work, and reward myself with the process of growth. It is to take the risk to feel like what it is to be alive. And what else do I have to do, but?

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